Christine the Lioness (3122)
Christopher the Pyro (1985)
ProphetJoe the Irreverent (1234)
Trouble the Pirate (600)
Keith the Director (573)
Mara the Peacemaker (532)
eric the Lil' Devil (351)
AJ the Zen Master (305)
Ben the Kingpin (213)
Haas the Addict (187)
Christine 2 the Mercenary (131) Lei the Mercenary (124) Katie the Mercenary (115)
Ben2 the Soldier (56) Christopher the Pyro commented
:-@
I think this post tries to imply that it is hard to get and keep a woman… it’s not.. none of things are important… just be an arrogant asshole you’ll be fine.
Christine the Lioness spake, and sayeth
I realize that has worked well for you, honey… but that’s only because you didn’t have any of the issues on the list… well, except for #7… but you’ve pretty much gotten that one under control now… 
aJ the Zen Master quibbed this
I’m glad to say that I avoid all those issues
And I’m single, so any girls interested
Haas the Addict added
Wonder if I should listen to the girl or the guy(#1). Will go with Christine on this one 
. After reading the list im feeling much better actually 
Christopher the Pyro penned this
aJ.. that is because you just won’t start listening to ME.. Christine doesn’t know what the hell she is talking about.. Now.. most of these things are common sense..the the real key to getting a girl is to try and make sure none of these flaws exist and yet completley and utterly avoid showing any amount of care in regards to them existing… otherwise your just a princess.
Christine the Lioness hunt n' pecked this
Haas… trust me. You hsould listen to the girl! That is always the case when it comes to choosing between me and Christopher.
And aJ… I highly doubt you would ever have trouble getting girls interested in you. I can tell you right now that from the comments I’ve read from you, you will definitely find an amazing woman who is perfect for you! Don’t listen to Christopher… he has issues with his manhood.
Trouble the Pirate quibbed this
What about excessive earwax, smelly toe-jam, nostril-dreadlocks, pubic-topiary, etc? Why not complete the ?metro-sexual check-list?? Thank Zoroaster that this list only applies until a chick has her second drink?
Keith the Director got all philosophical
Ya know i can honesly say I don’t have any of the afformentioned issues. No wonder things have been good for me Howevere like chris said a lot of it is or should be common sense! And as far as everything else troubled added some very good points but once again should be common sense. they didn’t make Q-tips for no reason. However one thing was missing from both your lists. Unless i’m mistaken i thought earwig was unattractive, but I guess you two don’t mind a lot of hair in your significant others ears? 
Also while on topic, Christine u might want to put a memo out for your girls too! Actually you know what? You inspired my next post for brightsyde Thanx hun 
too bad it will have to wait till tomorrow 
Christine the Lioness commented
I have always considered myself a muse, Keith… I’m glad you too have been inspired by me.
Earwig isn’t all that sexy, but unless you’re dating someone over 60, it really isn’t an issue.
Keith the Director said this
Very true earwig is prone to those of age, however people that are very hairy individuals one i know of in his mid 30’s has to trim his ear hair… so it is possible if it goes unattended! 
eric the Lil' Devil remarked
you know men need to change? sexual partners daily! and if i need to scratch my balls i will bounce them off of a ho’s chin until the urge to scratch is saficed!
Christine the Lioness commented
Maybe that statement right there just explains why they itch, Eric…
eric the Lil' Devil penned this
Keith the Director quibbed this
Actually it’s quite hard to contract anything while protecting yourself properly. Most itching is caused by dry skin or even sweat that has dried after working out or playing a sport. Which is defintely somethig most women don’t know anything about. I’m talking about working out and playing a sport by the way not the itchy balls feeling obviously. If a woman knows about that she has me worried!
Your Daddy the Virgin thought this
Who the F&ck gives a crap what you want, need or think bitch?!!! For real your just a women, get off yourself. If you dont like these things then just be a old maid for the rest of your life because your not worth changing a thing for. * goes back to the game *
aJ the Zen Master pontificated
Interesting.. Why do such losers never link back?
Or maybe because they are, duh, losers
aJ the Zen Master up'n wrote this
Hmm.. That did not come out right! Let’s try it once again
Interesting.. Why do such losers never link back to their blogs/identification page?
Maybe because they are, duh, losers
Christopher the Pyro scribbled
I hear ya there aJ.
Christine the Lioness quibbed this
I have a feeling that I hit a nerve for “Your Daddy” with this post. My guess… he has more than just a few of the not-so-attractive qualities and didn’t appreciate me pointing them out.
Trouble the Pirate pontificated
…and a Firefox L’user too… So much for your theory Chris… And Christine, there’s no chance of you ever being an OM4L {Old Maid 4 Life}, ’cause I’ll always take Chris’ sloppy 2nd’s…b-)
Keith the Director hunt n' pecked this
Way to reassert your self there aj We knew what you meant =d>
pawnshop the Virgin stated
First of all, to imply that doing these 10 things will get a man laid is pure false advertisment, unless your a whore. And we, as men, should be alowed to scratch our balls whenever we feel necessary. Why? because our balls on a regular basis, will stick to our leg, then we just have to get in there and mixit up.
Christine the Lioness pontificated
Pawn… I was not implying that these things will get you laid. I was implying that not addressing these things could very well prevent you from getting laid. And may I suggest some talcum powder to prevent the regular sticky ball problem. If you pick a kind that tastes and smells like almonds or vanilla… your girlfriend might want to get in there and suck on those balls even more than she does now. Just a thought… maybe, maybe not.
Christopher the Pyro got all philosophical
Three Myths about Gettings Laid.
1. You must smell nice.
2. You need to spend money on the woman.
3. You need to be nice to the woman.
Alphasapien the ummm...... the Virgin commented
I agree with Christine, on all points except the talcum powder. Go get some and put it on your hand……… now lick your hand. enough said.
Itchy balls can be greatly reduced by showering twice a day. Brush your teeth in the shower and use facial scrub, almost all problems on this list an be fixed that easily.
When you buy cologne don’t buy the cheep stuff, i have found Hugo Boss, and calvin klein usually go down well. a rule of thumb: if you can still smell it yourself after the first minute you put it on. its either too much or it doesn’t suit you.
If you gotta pick your nose……..well do it in the toilet. There is not really any good reason that it’s socially unacceptable our conditioning is the only thing that makes us think its gross………. but we are still conditioned that way.
The unwanted hair thing…….don’t shave it….its uncomfortable and just makes it thicker, depilatory creams are just as bad, waxing it yourself will leave horrible ingrown hairs which are worse than a hairy back. Your best choice is to get it professionally removed, or leave it there. Despite what Christine says, there are plenty of women who like a bit of hair.
If you wanna get laid….scrub up, dress nice, go to a pub/club and ask any woman that takes your fancy, if one says no ask a different woman, keep asking till you get a yes. Woman are mostly totally sick of the indirect way they have to pick up now. Everyone just wants to fuck.
Alphasapien the ummm...... the Virgin pontificated
and no i didnt hunt and peck this, i had to answer the phone 5 times before i finished.
Christine the Lioness chimed in with
Ha! It’s okay if you have to answer the phone… we realize you’re screwing around on our blog when you’re really supposed to be working.
As for the talcum powder… there are some that don’t taste bad, and the correct amount is the amount you can’t really taste– like the way cologne tastes like bitter alcohol if you accidentally get some in your mouth, but most of the time when you lick a guy’s neck, you can’t taste it but can still smell hints of it.
True, some women like hair… but it’s one of those things I think most women resigned themselves to saying they liked because they didn’t think there was much a guy could do about it. Just like some guys say they like overweight women because they don’t think they can get one that’s not. I’m not saying EVERYONE is like that– some really do like heavy girls, or guys with back hair– but there are also a lot of people who come up with reasons why it’s okay to settle, and then find a way to see past the thing they don’t find attractive. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong about that, but how many Abercrombie & Fitch models do you see with back hair sticking out of their shirts?
I don’t know if all women just want to fuck. It’s certainly not why I went to the clubs with my friends. I went because it was a fun thing girls can do together and women like going dancing (generally) more than men do. I never once went home with anyone I met at a club and for a couple years I was going a few nights a week. I think the reality is… women appreciate guys being honest about their intentions, and they don’t judge a guy for just wanting sex and nothing more. What they don’t want is some guy trying to work his game on them and being false. Honest guys at least get credit for being honest… and it’s better anyway because why would you want to have to dupe a girl who doesn’t really want to sleep with you into sleeping with you? It’s just better when everyone is on the same page and knows what everyone else wants or doesn’t want.
)
als pls
any indian gls 
Christine the Lioness remarked
Indian girls??? You’ve come to the right place! Keep refreshing the page and eventually at the top you’ll see an ad for shaadi.com (i think that’s what it was)… it’s like match.com for Indian people.
Abysium the Soldier said this
LOL,
just refering to point 3;
-first of all some statistics(read this in FHM -For Him Magasine)
-67% of girls expect you to shave(or wax or whatever) befour they go to bed with you
-(only) 1% of all girls like hairy men…
-now what does that meen? It meens that only 1 girl out of the hundred will like you if youre all hairy… but what is the bright side of this? ever been to a party where theres like 600 people? and lets say even statistics meen theres 300 girls… that meens only 3 will like the hairy type…
-but where is the catch you ask me?
-at this point it is vitaly important that you are the ONLY hairy type there (which is not hard with all the metrosexual trends this days)
-this meens there will be 3 girls who automaticaly favour you just for youre hairines (thou you lose the other 297), but on the other hand not being hairy will get you no extra favour of the above mentioned 297, but will get you 299 guys as competition…
Enough maths, now to put my post into perspective;
I am probably the closest thing that comes to the so called “missing link” (proof that man evolved from ape) althou in my case it would also be probable that man evolved from bears… get my drift?
But that didnt seem too much of a relationship problem for me since i am dating a hottie for the last 2 years, who thinks my hairgrowth isue is extremly “hot”… No, I dont acctually understand why it should be hot, but am fully prepared to accept it as that as long as it gets me laid
oww, and about the other 9 points: i think that they should be known as common sense… althou for some they aint… their problem if you ask me…
Abysium the Soldier added
When I mentioned shaving in the prior point I forgot to point out that the back is the crucial part where shaving (or whatever) should be aplied…
How in the 7 names of hell am I supposed to shave my back? I got truble washing it FFS…
Christine the Lioness got all philosophical
Nair.
Abysium the Soldier spake, and sayeth
Nair?
Abysium the Soldier scribbled
you must be thinking of the hair removal product, cos the only other possibility is “National Arrangements for Incidents involving Radioactivity”
never heard of it, but dictionary.com has…
I really dont see the point of losing my hair since it earns me extra points at certain people…
besides, am a monkey/bear/whatever and am proud
*says goodbye to his virginity*
trust me on this the Virgin uttered
TRUST ME
lose the bad breath! poor guy, didn’t know that the reason i wouldn’t date him was because he had terrible death breath!!! when he was kissing me he didn’t know that i was throwing up in my mind (and trying to hold my breath)….
Abysium the Soldier got all philosophical
seconds thatone, but also thinks it obvious…
Bad Breath Remedies the Virgin thought this
For bad breath, gargling mouthwash is a sensible tip but to spit it on the sidewalk will not make any man cool.
My suggestion would be to take sugarless gums instead. These gums stimulates production of saliva and increases salivary flow. That helps to clean the teeth and neutralizes some of the acid produced by bacteria in your mouth. In the process, the risk of having bad breath is greatly reduced.
Christopher the Pyro stated
Christine is allergic to sugarless gum… go figure, and while I think it is hilarious when her tongue swells up…. (also helpful when she is in a venting mood) it gets old dragging her to the emergency room.
Christine the Lioness asserted
Emergency room my ass. He offers me a piece of sugarless gum constantly and when I remind him I can’t have it, he sits back for a moment then suggests I try it anyway because maybe this particular brand doesn’t have the thing that makes my throat swell shut. I politely decline… again. So if anything’s getting old… it’s definitely not the ER trips.
Abysium the Soldier asserted
lol
you should try melting the gum in food so she doesnt know she eats it;)
no, just a little joke, but you can still try if you want to….(thou I wouldnt)
Christine the Lioness said this
Yeah, that’s probably not a good idea, Abysium. I realize I’m blonde, but… I’d probably figure that one out.
Abysium the Soldier hunt n' pecked this
yeah, but it would be too late by then
Christine the Lioness mentioned
Hrmmm… maybe. 
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