2005 | April | Battle of the Sexes : Chris vs Chris

Originally posted on May 24th, 2005

Some people just take their coffee drinking WAY too serious… Now I really don’t have a problem with people who like drinking “good coffee” (as if there is such a thing) but I do have a problem with people who think they are better then me because they have been brainwashed by Starfucks Inc into thinking they are cool because they are drinking some lame ass coffee that a corporation made cool to drink.
Now people who mind their own business and buy good coffee grind it up and drink their coffee without looking down on me with my styrofoam cup of shitty Folders coffee y’all are cool with me. Very live and let live type of people, it’s the Starfuck minions that are on my nerves today… Now you must all understand I fucking HATE the taste of coffee, I drink it for two [...]

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It’s… it’s Alive…

Posted on April 24th, 2005 by Christine.
Categories: Hilarious.

Gone Wild The story begins several months ago when Christopher banished a half-used bag of russet potatoes to the dark, cool, cavernous area below his kitchen sink. Shoving the plastic bag in the cabinet, he went on with his daily activities like learning. The potatoes didn’t fare well in “the hole.” As a matter of fact, it wasn’t long before the eyes, shrouded by the darkness, began to spore tiny green tentacles. Their once tough brown skin loosened as the starchy insides shrank, becoming loose and leathery. Desperate for water and sunlight, the roots took on a flesh color and began to slide along the press board bottom until they reached the side. …

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29 comments.

Then and Now…

Posted on April 23rd, 2005 by Christine.
Categories: Current Events & Politics.

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0 comments.

Statistics

Posted on April 21st, 2005 by Christopher.
Categories: Sports Fanatics.

New York: The United States Report on Unsubstantiated Statistics reports that statistics with no basis in fact was up 12.8% in 2004 compared to 2003. This nearly $25 Million study, up by 3.5% from the previous year, gathered data on nearly 83% of the total statistics published in print, internet news, and congressional reports.

Some of the highlights include a 45% increase in wardrobe malfunctions, 23% increase in violence against persons, 95% decrease in trust in the government, and .05% decrease in people believing government reports (in which only 35% of the US population believes it anyway.)

When asked about the government making up statistics, a leader of the congressional ethics committee said, “We’re Congress. We don’t make things up.” That was …

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3 comments.

Gambling Problems

Posted on April 18th, 2005 by Christopher.
Categories: Pissed Off & Proud of It.

I saw in the news today that Vegas as a show of good will has stop allowing people to gamble on the NBA all star game, they are doing this to try and help people who are gambling addicts. Vegas is doing their part… lol.. how fucking hilarious. Ok.. first of all if you gamble on the NBA All Star game you have very deep deep gambling problems.. I can’t see removing one game.. that nobody else besides the deeply troubles addicts bet on anyway.. is really going to help anybody at all. So in the nature of helping people I’ve compiled some signs that you have a gambling problem.

1. You bet on college football spring …

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3 comments.