If You Offend Me, I Might Die…
I looked at him. At first, I thought maybe he’d accidentally substituted the word “cloak” for “jeans” or something. “What do you mean?” I asked, not yet disturbed because I didn’t fully understand that there wasn’t an error involved. “Cloaks… you know… like Anniken wears.” “You mean you want to dress up? Like the freaks who’ve been sitting in front of the theater for three weeks waiting?” “They’re not freaks. There’s some hot girls sitting out there.” I knew he’d clearly lost his mind. “I’m sure there are… it never ceases to amaze me what women will do for their guys when they’re in love.” “I’m going to buy us cloaks.,” he said. There was determination in his voice. Resolve. He’ll change his mind, I thought. Soon, he’ll realize this is a very bad idea and he’ll decide we don’t need cloaks… or the cloaks will be sold out already. Good, good… Christopher is a procrastinator… there’s no way he’ll get to the cloak store before they’re gone… cloak manufacturers could never have anticipated the sharp spike in cloak sales… “Just make sure mine has a hood,” I said. “So no one can see my face.” I was sort of kidding, but not really.
“That’s what they wear with the cloaks,” he said. Oh my God… I thought, he really is serious about the cloak thing. And now he wants to make sure I wear the right shoes so I don’t look like an idiot… God, he’s lucky he’s so skilled in cunnilingus… “I guess if I have to wear flip flops, I will,” I said, thinking I better get muchas brownie points for this. He laughed. “I was just kidding. You don’t have to wear flip flops,” he said.
The movie opens with a battle scene where else but in space. There are lasers and explosions and space rocks hurling at us. There are robot droids and space ships and sliding doors that could tear even the most agile space fighter jet in half. I sit in my seat thinking that if it’s true that men love spatial concepts, the layers and multiple planes of spinning objects and imaginative fighting machines must be almost orgasmic. I look over at Christopher. His eyes are glued to the screen– unblinking– like a cat. The movie was good… very entertaining and it did a great job of wrapping up all the story lines, including the most interesting which is how Anniken succumbs to the dark side, how the Republic is lost, and how Luke and Lea are born without anyone (including Darth Vader) finding out. Unlike the Matrix trilogy which ended on a disappointing note, Star Wars Episode III does a good job of giving the viewer what they came there to see. The effects were nothing less than amazing, and if one doesn’t expect too much from the dialogue, the story is simple, but entertaining nonetheless. But all good things must come to an end. And so it did.
|
