Originally posted on February 28th, 2005

Want to fuck girls that look like this? … ok then.. listen up

Tarney Halle

If you ever hear a woman say the words “He’s nice” you can pull out all the money you have on you and bet that she’s not fucking nor will she be fucking the guy she’s talking about… not now.. not ever.

This is easy so drill it into your head. Women don’t use the word “Nice” to describe men that they’re FEELING it for.
So why would you want to use the “usual nice guy routine”?
What, you want to make SURE she never feels anything other than friendship for you?
I didn’t think so.

(Hint: In case you haven’t figured it out, I think you should ix-nay the ice-nay uy-gay outine-ray.)
And I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the words “nice guy” translate into “ICE-NAY UY-GAY” in Pig [...]

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Stabbing’s, Poisoning’s and Attempted Drowning

Posted on August 30th, 2005 by Christopher.
Categories: Hilarious.

Most of our regular readers have heard bits and parts of the story where Christine stabbed me in the shoulder with a steak knife. Originally I decided that I wouldn’t tell this story.. (she is embarrassed that she has a violent side… I on the other hand fully embrace mine), but I’ve come to realize that I need to tell this story just incase I come to an untimely demise.. I want everybody here to know who is responsible.
“Cunt’. That is little word was what pushed Christine over the edge.. We were hanging out in her kitchen and she was cooking dinner (as she should) and I was ranting about someone.. Probably that loony girl down in Texas …

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34 comments.

The Day is Coming…

Posted on August 22nd, 2005 by Christine.
Categories: Sports Fanatics.

The only Bush that’s made a good decision in the last four years… is Reggie.

With1 4 returning starters and 6 All-Americans… I am supremely confident that my USC Trojans will once again, emerge as one of the best teams in college football history. Reggie’s back, and so is Matt. The sound of a stadium full of people singing “U-C-L-A Sucks…” caresses my ears, bringing a sentimental tear to my eye.

I hate to brag… I really do. But proudly cloaked in cardinal and gold, I wear my heart on my sleeve. And my heart was captured long ago when Traveler first made his way onto the field on a hot August day in San Diego– the very …

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11 comments.

Not so far fetch headlines from 2025

Posted on August 22nd, 2005 by Christopher.
Categories: Hilarious.

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia formally known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia’s third language.
My Thoughts: Lets wall off the border while we still have a chance.. while we are at it, we should ban anything smaller then my Audi. (Yes an A4 is small but I am a self-serving person so I can’t be banning my own car!).
Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon)
My Thoughts: Amen
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
My Thoughts: Jesus, figures we are going to undo the only …

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15 comments.

The Magic Number

Posted on August 22nd, 2005 by Christine.
Categories: Sex and Relationships.

At what point does a woman “need” to sleep with a guy before he loses interest in dating her any more?

I’ve known lots of guys, friends and men I’ve dated or been in relationships with, and most of them tell me that there’s no magic number… but I think they just tell me that because I’m a woman and they don’t want to look like assholes.

The truth is, we women learn pretty early on that there is definitely an expectation among guys that if a woman doesn’t want to sleep with them, eventually they will date someone who does. I know that in the past, I’ve felt some pressure (maybe self-imposed) to have sex by date 3…

Is there a …

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29 comments.

One of Christine’s Many Ways to Make the World a Better Place…

Posted on August 21st, 2005 by Christine.
Categories: Sports Fanatics.

Click here to read about Christopher’s problems adhering to traffic laws. My point is… the fines are so excessive compared to the actual infraction. I realize that they think this is more of a deterrent, but it’s not.

See… there are three …

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27 comments.

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