So for the past month or so Christine and I have been debating if her 3/4 Indian blood makes her a “real” life American Native Indian.
Granted her 1/8 German, 1/8 English, 2/8 Mutt really muddle her bloodline, however I thought I could and therefor should put this debate to rest once and for all. Two or three days ago on Thanksgiving Christine and I were kicking it and watching the History Channel where there was a documentary about the Pilgrims and the Wampanoag Indian tribe. It turns out the the Wampanoag tribe is the same tribe that Christine’s bloodline came from. I quickly decided that Wampanoag was a horrible name and changed it to Walka Walka.. (as Christine pointed out.. very Starwarsish) like that is some kind of insult. So Christine is a Walka Walka Indian.. these Indian are pretty good ones.. I was always pretty sure she was a Cherokee or a wacko woman tribe… like Crazy Women Scalping Tribe. But it turns out she comes from a tribe of mostly nice sane Indians.
Even more interesting.. it turns out we killed off most fo the Walka Walka Indians here in America so for the last year she has been traveling to Canada to visit with her tribe under the guise of writing movies… ( Ya Christine I’m onto you now ).. that’s ok I go to Strip Clubs to hang out with my bouncer friends so I’m not too distraught over this deception. I think for your own sake Christine it would be best if you finally got comfortable with your Native American heritage.. it’s not the 18th century anymore, nobody is going to judge you harshly. You know what they say about Native American girls.. they are wild in bed, great cooks and little firecrackers ( those are all positives) which pretty much describes you to a T. Well except for the fact that your more like dynamite.. or Nitro Glycerin. Ayway nobody says anything bad about the Indians anymore… don’t be ashamed of your heritage.. embrace it Christine. I promise everybody will still like you.