Originally posted on February 28th, 2005

Want to fuck girls that look like this? … ok then.. listen up

Tarney Halle

If you ever hear a woman say the words “He’s nice” you can pull out all the money you have on you and bet that she’s not fucking nor will she be fucking the guy she’s talking about… not now.. not ever.

This is easy so drill it into your head. Women don’t use the word “Nice” to describe men that they’re FEELING it for.
So why would you want to use the “usual nice guy routine”?
What, you want to make SURE she never feels anything other than friendship for you?
I didn’t think so.

(Hint: In case you haven’t figured it out, I think you should ix-nay the ice-nay uy-gay outine-ray.)
And I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the words “nice guy” translate into “ICE-NAY UY-GAY” in Pig [...]

More

17 Comment(s)

40 Reasons Why Christopher is Happier then Christine

Posted on June 30th, 2007 by Christopher.
Categories: Hilarious.

My last name stays put.

The garage is all mine.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack.

I can be President. 

I can’t get pregnant.

I can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

I can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell me the truth.

The world is my urinal. 

I never …

Keep reading >>

16 comments.

Liquid Fire For Your Viewing Pleasure

Posted on June 27th, 2007 by Christopher.
Categories: Crazy Pictures.

After watching Christine and Mara have some seriously deep debate I’ve decided it was time to lighten things up for the boys again.. (pictures)… why? Because when there are too many words… we just zone out… and I have to say that both Mara and Christine are guilty of not using enough big words in their comments. Some suggestions? (strippers, sex, AMP, doggy style) I’m sure your getting the point ladies.  I’m updating this now to try and and make it so only one of these pictures is appearing on the front of the site.  Christine’s latest post is the post that keeps on giving ugh..

Liquid Fire #1…

Keep reading >>

16 comments.

Proud to Be an American

Posted on June 25th, 2007 by Christine.
Categories: Current Events & Politics.

images.jpg

With all the world’s hate for the U.S. based on a myriad of reasons from our system of government, to our president, to our foreign policy… I’d just like to bring light to a fact that inspired an article on CNN today: Americans donated more money to charities worldwide than the citizens of any other country– twice as much in fact than the second most charitable country which was Britain.

In total, Americans donated almost $300 billion to charities last year in response to the needs created by the Asian tsunami, and hurricanes Katrina, Wilma, and Rita. Excluding relief funds for various disasters around the world, the 2006 total of philanthropic giving in the …

Keep reading >>

132 comments.

How to Get the Attention of the Police

Posted on June 24th, 2007 by Christopher.
Categories: Hilarious.

Going to bed the other night I noticed people walking around the car ports for my apartment building stealing things.

I called the police and was told nobody was in the area to help but that they would send someone over as soon as possible.

I hung up and a minute later I hung up and called back. “Hi, I called a minute ago about some people walking around my car port, you don’t have to hurry anymore because I shot them.”

Within minutes there were a half a dozen police, a helicopter and an swat unit. They caught the burgles red handed.

One of the officers said “I thought you said you shot them. ” To which I replied “I thought …

Keep reading >>

8 comments.

11 Phrases Women Should Not Tell Me

Posted on June 23rd, 2007 by Christopher.
Categories: Hilarious.

1 The phrase ‘I’d say it’s bang-on average, if not slightly bigger’. Best to steer clear of the size issue. Like us talking about your weight, it can only lead to misunderstanding and hurt.
2 Obsessive accounts of your diet and exercise regime. Men like skinny women, true. But they dislike being exposed to the borderline eating disorders and pathological obsessiveness that produce them. And curvy and sane always beats mad and thin. Eventually.

3 The accusing phrase, ‘What’s wrong with the blue dress, then?’ after we have said we like the red one.

4 Any information about things you …

Keep reading >>

18 comments.

« Older