Originally posted on March 14th, 2005


Here’s how to tell if your man is straight or gay…

10.
Straight: He wears the same shirt for three days.
Gay: He wears three shirts a day.

9.
Straight: He thinks you spend too much money on getting your hair done.
Gay: He offers to do your belliage for you to save you money.

8.
Straight: When you ask him if he thinks Orlando Bloom is hot, he says, “I can’t judge if other guys are hot or not.”
Gay: When you ask him if he thinks Orlando Bloom is hot, he says, “Well… not as hot as Antonio Banderas.”

7.
Straight: A weekend outing with the “guys” involves either golf, football, or lap dances.
Gay: A weekend outing with the “guys” involves dancing, wine tasting, or a quick trip to San Francisco.

6.
Straight: He owns [...]

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65 Comment(s)

Weird Thought of the Day…

Posted on August 28th, 2007 by Christine.
Categories: True Story.

If you’ve been reading our site for a long time, you’ve probably seen at least one of my ‘weird thoughts’ posts. This is one of those.

The other day, I was watching a commercial with people dancing. And my thought was… I wonder what aliens would think if they came to Earth and witnessed someone turning on music and people suddenly started wiggling their bodies around, making faces, turning in circles, etc. Would they think that maybe we’re allergic to music or something? It’d be a logical thought. When the music shuts off, people stop. They might think that music is somehow trance-inducing and we lose control of our bodies when we hear it.

I think …

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15 comments.

Miss Teen U.S.A

Posted on August 28th, 2007 by Christopher.
Categories: Hilarious.

Asked why a fifth of Americans could not locate the United States on a world map…..

Her answer, in its entirety, was: “I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uhmmm, some people out there in our nation don’t have maps and uh, I believe that our, I, education like such as, uh, South Africa, and uh, the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should, uhhh, our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., uh, should help South Africa, it should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future, for …

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16 comments.

Things I Learned About Soccer

Posted on August 24th, 2007 by Christine.
Categories: Hilarious, Sports Fanatics, True Story.

t1_0815_becks.jpg

Last night, Christopher took me to my first pro soccer game: Los Angeles Galaxy vs. Chivas USA.

We had a really good time and completely enjoyed it, but there were some things I noticed (and maybe I was in the perfect position to notice them since I hadn’t seen a game before), that I think need to be changed about the game. Here they are:

1. The area in front of the goal is called the “penalty box.” I’ve decided that this name is confusing. In hockey, the penalty box is where the players sit when they get ejected, but in soccer, no one sits in the penalty box. Very, …

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21 comments.

Starfucks Tip Cups

Posted on August 23rd, 2007 by Christopher.
Categories: Pissed Off & Proud of It.

*UM ERMUM*

Glancing up from my newly poured steaming cup of coffee at the wimpy looking dude behind the counter at Starfucks I think to myself.. “what now”.

Christopher: “What’s up?”

SFE: (Starfucks Employee): Points at the tip cup.

Christopher: “You want me to tip you??”

SFE: “It’s customary…….”

Christopher: “So is being heterosexual”

SFE: “Pardon…..”

Christopher: “You want me to tip you for pouring me a cup of coffee? There is no way I’m giving you a tip for that… are you out of your fucking mind.. do you really expect people who just paid like.. 5 dollars for a cup of coffee to fork over some lose change just because you made a poor career choice?”

SFE: “HEY! I HAD TO GO TO COLLEGE FOR THIS!”

Christopher: …

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82 comments.

Muy Bien Mexico

Posted on August 15th, 2007 by Christopher.
Categories: Hilarious.

Everybody here knows how I feel about all the illegal immigrants streaming across our borders, stealing jobs from Americans, not speaking English, blah blah blah.. Unfortunately most of you (judging from my email box) with your limited thought capacity are applying this to the Mexican people as a whole. What is wrong with you! It is nuts to group all Mexicans in with the illegals that are coming here screwing up our country. Today I want to focus on the positives of Mexican culture on America.

  1. Sombreros - I don’t know about you, but I’m constantly looking for a hat large enough to put off enough shade to not only completely keep me cool but also

…

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24 comments.

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