Is Your Girlfriend Insecure About Her Looks? You Can Help!

Posted on March 16th, 2005 by Christine.
Categories: Sex and Relationships.

Women, by nature, are very self-critical about their looks. If you don’t believe me, just look at the amount of money we spend on getting our hair done, skin products, weight-loss programs, clothes, and plastic surgeries each year. “Being more beautiful” is big business in America, and our culture perpetuates the notion that if women aren’t beautiful, they won’t be successful, they won’t keep a man, and they won’t be respected. So… it’s not entirely our fault that we sometimes become obsessed with our appearances, develop eating disorders, and wind up being very insecure.

We can spend time complaining about how unfair it is for society to put pressure on women to be physically perfect, but chances are, we’re not going to change it. You probably just want that one special girl in your life to be a little less insecure about herself, so I’m going to give you some advice on how to make that happen.

First, you need to objectively decide whether or not you might be part of the problem. I’m not suggesting that you try to make your girlfriend feel bad about herself, but you may be doing or saying things that inadvertently make her feel less attractive than she wants to be. So just be aware of what you say (or don’t say), because it could make a difference.

Don’t constantly point out how attractive other women are.
Women want to believe that you think we are the hottest girl to walk the planet. We know we’re not… but we want to believe that you are so attracted to us, you can barely control yourself. We’d like to think that you masturbate thinking about us, and don’t forget we exist altogether when you pick up an issue of Playboy… at least we’d like to think so. We know there are plenty of women around that are more attractive than we are, but you don’t need to point them out every time you see one. It’s okay, when you see an attractive girl, whether it be on t.v., in a magazine, or out in public, to keep your opinion to yourself.

In addition, be conscious of the words you use when describing how attractive other women are. If you tell your girlfriend every day that you think she’s pretty, and then describe another woman as “smoking hot” or “a mega-hottie,” it’s pretty much like saying “Honey, you’re okay, but too bad you don’t look like that girl.” Whether you mean it that way or not, thaat’s how she’ll take it. So while you think you’re constantly telling her how attractive she is, she’s only going to hear that she’s not as attractive as someone else. And whether she tells you or not, she’ll feel that she doesn’t make the grade.

Don’t ogle other girls.
We see what you’re looking at when you hold your gaze on an attractive woman too long. It’s actually worse than making a point of saying how hot that woman is because we know you’re thinking it and just own’t admit it. In a nutshell, when you’re with your girl, you’re with her. If you are always looking around, we know you’re wishing something better would come along.

Tell her she’s beautiful when you’re not in bed with her.
Men say all kinds of things when they’rebanging your brains out. And whether or not you’re bing sincere, most things said in bed are chalked up to pillow talk. So make a point of telling her that she’s beautiful when she’s just being herself, doing the mundane things she does every day. One of the most memorable compliments I ever recieved was from a guy I didn’t even know. I was at a Kinko’s waiting to get a picture taken for my passport. The Kinko’s photographer told me I had to take my hair out of it’s ponytail for the picture. So as I stood there waiting for my turn, I kept fussing with my hair. A guy I’d never even seen before– just some guy making copies– walks past me and says “Don’t worry about it. You’re beautiful.” And then he walked off. He said it like it was as much of a fact as assuring me that the sky is blue. I think I stood there with my mouth open for at least a minute. And then felt good about myself for days.

Even though that guy was a stranger, not my boyfriend, the effect would be the same if you said something similar to your woman. Say it at a moment when you have nothing to gain by saying it and say it like it’s so painfully obvious, you’d have to be Stevie Wonder not to see it. Hearing that from you will make her feel more secure.

Take her out.
I’ve come to realize that women assign much different meaning to “going out” than men do. When a guy takes a girl out, he’s communicating two things: (1) that he finds her special enough that he wants to plan something with her, and (2) he’s proud to show her off to the world. If you never want to take her out, she will undoubtedly wonder why, and probably come up with the idea that you don’t think she’s attractive enough to be seen with her. It’s really important to us that you are proud of us and you want the world to know it. While dinners at home can be extremely romantic, wanting to be seen in public with a girl accomplishes much more than just eating dinner.

Memorize the correct answer to “Do I look fat?”
As embarrassed as I am to admit this, I’ve said it to boyfriends before. Women don’t think about how much they’re putting you on the spot by saying this. But here’s the secret… at the moment a women decides to ask this question, she’s really saying “My self-esteem is at an all-time low at this very moment. As a matter of fact, I no longer even have the ability to recognize which outfits are most flattering even though at one point I bought this outfit because it looked good on me.” It’s a girls’way of telling you she needs a self-esteem boost and needs one quick. It is not a question that needs an honest response.

The correct answer to that question is, “Why is it always the hot women that think they look fat?”

Badda bing! Not only have you squelched the notion that she might be fat, but you’ve assured her that you think she’s hot and obviously other people think so too.

Buy her lingerie.
Contrary to what some women will tell you, this is not a faux pas. Getting lingerie from our boyfriends tells us that he thinks about having sex with us when we’re not even with him. While women are very flattered when other men find them attractive, we really only care about being attractive to one guy. Telling us that you want nothing more than to see us lying on the bed in some frilly, sheer neglige is just like saying, “I think you’re hot. I love having sex with you. And if you wear this, you will be fulfilling a fantasy for me.” Yes, we want to be your fantasy.

Another bit of advice, if you don’t know her size, guess too small.

Don’t make a point of how attractive she used to be.
If she shows you photos of herself from high school, don’t say something like “You don’t look like that anymore,” or “You used to be super hot, ” or “Wow, your hair was pretty back then.” Whether you intend them to be or not, those are backhanded compliments and basically tell her that her looks are fading. Say something like “I guess you’ve always been a hottie, huh?” That implies she was hot then and you still think she’s hot.

Show her how attracted you are to her.
There are two ways to tell your woman that you’r e attracted to her. The best scenario is to come up with a combination of the two. You can be very serious so she knows you mean it… like while she’s working at her computer, you can stare at her for a moment and when she looks up and says, “What?” you can say, “Nothing. I just love looking at you.” She will smile and probably blush, and be glad she has you for a boyfriend.

Or you can be witty and joke about it. You can intentionally drop something and wait for her to bend down to pick it up. When she hands it to you, drop it again, just so you can see her bend over again, or get another peek down her shirt. When she realizes that’s the game, she’ll laugh and probably elbow you, but she’ll be flattered as well.

The truth is, when women feel secure about themselves, they’re more advneturous in bed, less bitchy, less jealous, and are able to focus more of their attention on you than all the negative things about themelves. You shouldn’t feel responsible for maintaining someone else’s self-esteem, but women care a lot about what their men think of them, so just because you’re in her life, you have a significant amount of influence. Even the littlest things you do, or don’t do, can help your girl feel like a princess. Sometimes little things make a big diffrence. -)

44 comments.

Spelling not so important? »« I’m proof

Christopher the Pyro hunt n' pecked this

I will have to agree with Christine on some of her points here but I also think alot of what she had to say is complete bs, (and yes we’ve had these talks one on one). Let me start by saying I agree women are somewhat crazy about their looks, it’s one of the reasons I’m glad to be a guy. This whole society pressure thing is a bunch of bullshit, what Christine stated is how society preceives things because it is the truth, if you are unattractive or fat you are likely to be less sucessful (whether your a guy or girl that is true), you are less likley to hold on to your man.. (why would he settle for someone he isn’t attracted to? And if your a fat and ugly complaining about who unfair the world is that is just fucking annoying and your not going to be respected because guess what everybody.. life isn’t fair and that bit goes for both guys and girls, quit fucking bitching.

Decide whether or not you might be part of the problem
Her second point of we need to decide if we are part of the problem… ok your not. If your woman has issues it is her fault not yours don’t let her convince you otherwise. You arn’t affected when she tells you that you are a fat ass lazy couch potatoe why would she be affected because you don’t find her to be the most banging woman on the planet anymore? Women need to find their security within themselves and to stop depending on men to make them feel secure because if that is their game plan they are fucked anyway.

Don?t constantly point out how attractive other women are.
Yew women would like be delusional and think they are the most beautiful women on the planet.. chances are they are not the hottest girl on the planet and they ogle guys and point out how cute Brad Pitt or someone else is, women you can’t have it both ways want to be our best friend as well as our girl friend then get use to us talking about women because they are on our mind and we enjoy looking at them. So please… grow up and work on my last point.. (finding self esteem from within for those who are mentally challenged). Another point if your women is affected by you checking a girl out in a magazine and making a comment your fucked anyway you should get out of that relationship because obviously she has issues that are far deeper that you can possibly hope to help.

Don?t ogle other girls.
Spar me this is crazy.. don’t give up your right to look at women.. giving up this right is the first step toward being a whipped bitch.

Tell her she?s beautiful when you?re not in bed with her.
Yes.. do this, it will get her into bed.. duh. On top of this.. there is never a moment you will have nothing to gain from making her feel pretty especially in front of other people.. it will get you laid.

Take her out.
This is also dumb.. Christine is obviously clueless as to what men think.. when we take a woman out #1 it’s because we their company is tolerable to the point where we can handle them for a few hours. Yes we do bring our girls out if they are a nice arm piece but only if they fit requirement #1 and it’s actualy needed. Do you want to take your girl out once in awhile .. yes it will get you laid and keep her off your ass.. but becareful you don’t do it too much otherwise your fucked when it slows down a bit. Obviously if your girl is unattractive then yes your not going to want to take her out.. so either lose her and find someone your attracted to or bite the bullet and take her out once in awhile. I personally think woman attach to much significance to this considering.. it doesn’t really mean shit to me when I take a girl out other then I enjoy their company.

Memorize the correct answer to ?Do I look fat??
Ya know what, fuck this if they are dumb enough to ask, be honest they should fucking ask stupid fucking questions because the truth is only girls who are overweight even a little ask this question.. skinny girls who are in shape and work out don’t…. and if they do.. and you tell them you think they are fat they will kill themselves anyway.. so that will pretty much will take care of itself. Once again.. you are not responsible for their happiness or self-esteem.

Buy her lingerie.
Don’t do this, u can’t possibly get it right.

Don?t make a point of how attractive she used to be.
Ya know I don’t get this, why do girls keep pictures of themselves when they were younger if they don’t want us to comment? I personally find it a little strange that girls hang pictures of themselves up.. but whatever.. nobody ever said they made sense.

Show her how attracted you are to her.
You better do this.. if you want to get laid.. otherwise replace her.

March 16th, 2005

Christine the Lioness commented

It is obvious from Christopher’s response that he is much more concerned with getting a girl to fuck him than actually caring about her as a person. I would like to believe that most guys give a shit about how their women feel, and doing things that you know make her feel bad and then telling her that it’s her problem, she shouldn’t be so insecure, is not only insensitive, but mean. Of course we want to be your best friend, but we also have our own feelings and they do get hurt when you trample on them. Society does put more pressure on women to be attractive than it does on men. Plain and simple. If Christopher took two seconds to step outside of himself, he’d see that’s the case.
I’m not sure what Christopher accomplishes by intentionally doing things that make me people feel bad about themselves. If you care about someone, you want them to feel good and be happy. I would hope that someday, I will have a husband who won’t leave me or cheat on me simply because I got fat, or was in a scarring car accident or because like everyone, I will get old and my looks will fade. I think that is extremely superficial, and I am holding on to hope that there are still men out there who will love a woman for who she is, and not dump her because they think they can get someone hotter. I would certainly not leave my husband because he started to go bald or anything like that.
Christopher says I’m clueless as to what men think… well I think he missed the point of my post. I was trying to clue guys in on what women think… I can see for Christopher, that it’s all about what he thinks/wants/likes… and fuck the woman or her feelings or her needs or whatever. He should apparently just be able to treat her like shit and she should have a strong enough self-esteem to just get over it. I guess fuck women that we like to go out… according to Christopher, it shouldn’t really matter that going out is meaningful to the woman… women should just all change and be like him. Fuck the fact that we are not all the same– we should just all attach same significance to stuff that Christopher does because God forbid women should be their own people.

So, guys… if you agree with Christopher, then good luck. I was just trying to help you find ways to a better relationship with a girl you care about. I really believe that women will gravitate to men who treat them well and make them feel good about themselves. And I also believe that if you don’t make an effort to do that, your woman will find a guy who will.

March 16th, 2005

Keely the Virgin stated

I am so with Chris on the lingerie thing - don’t buy it guys. At least not for me. Clothes just slow things down anyway - and some girls just don’t want to waste time with foreplay ) .

Great blog!

March 16th, 2005

Christopher the Pyro thought this

It’s not that I’m more concerned with getting a girl to sleep with me that isn’t too hard.. what i’m tryingn to point out is that it is absolutley insane for guy to even hope they can fix or even help deep issues that there woman has. I’m not arguing that society thinks women should be hot.. i think that also??? and damnit that is how things should be! Getting fat is usually a choice I think if someone chooses to let themselves go then that is a valid reason for the husband not to be as attracted anymore… being in a car wreak is a different animal when you love someone and something bad happens to them, that does not change your feelings when they choose to get fat.. that’s a different story and that is just the flat out truth.

On the intentionally doing things to make people feel bad about themselves.. .we are all better of when we are told the truth living in a delusion is unhealthy and dumb.. if your fat workout, eat right do something about it.. living in a delusion won’t fix that. As for it being all about me.. ya probably we can only make ourselves happy and we can’t out on others to do it for us… if we do that nobody will be happy and certainly God willing the world will be a better place if women just finally start attaching the same significance to things that I do.. god.. figure it out already ladies. )

Look guys you will be alot happier actually listening to me why? You will tap alot of girls and in the process not go broke, insane or be completely unhappy being with a girl who asks you daily if she is fat. The fact is, when you meet the girl you want to settle with.. you’ll treat her right and you won’t need anybody to tell you how to do it and for the women who want a pussy whipped lil girl for a boyfriend.. your girlfriends are their to build your self-esteem.. not us guys… I mean after all you are here to look hot and sexy for us.. !

March 16th, 2005

Keely the Virgin stated

Christopher,
Personally, if you have a girl that is obsessed with her image, I say dump her. She needs to learn to be happy with herself before she will be any good to you. That being said…

…A woman tends to be a lot more accomidating (if you catch my drift) when they think they are a hottie in your eyes. Lot’s of flattery doesn’t hurt.

March 16th, 2005

Christopher the Pyro chimed in with

Keely,

Of course your right about the accomidating thing… i just can’t stand the whole victim mentality.. the world is so much harder on women bullshit lol. Look I’m not saying we should be mean to our girls or even that they won’t fuck us more, fuck us better or be generally more nympho if we build them up.. because they will.. what I’m saying.. is that making them feel attractive isn’t really doing you or them a favor. Helping to enforce their delusion is just stupid… if you dig the girl then in the long run you will be better served by helping her help herself.. now if you just like digging her out.. then feed her whatever bs her little delusional brain wants to hear.

March 17th, 2005

Christine the Lioness mentioned

Christopher is making this much more complicated than it needs to be. If you’re dating a girl, you must be at least somewhat attracted to her. Is it really that big of a deal to tell her once in a while?

It’s like how men need to hear that they’re good in bed… it would be very easy for me to say “Well, obviously you’re good in bed or I wouldn’t be fucking you, would I? So I don’t ever really need to tell you that the sex was good.” But that’s just me being a lazy bitch. Guys are much more willing to go that extra mile when he thinks he’s the best you’ve ever had… so according to Christopher, feeding that delusion doesn’t help in the long run… but how does it hurt? No one is saying that his entire self-worth is based on me saying he’s good in bed… and for most women, their self-worth isn’t based on thinking they’re the most beautiful woman in the world either. But there’s nothing wrong with caring enough about the person you’re with to want them to feel good about themselves. No one wants to hear over and over what their faults are… especially not from someone who is supposed to care about them. And people who feel good about themselves are the ones who are empowered to go out and make them even better. I guess in Christopher’s mind, pointing out how unattractive and inferior someone is somehow helps her to help herself. That’s just not true.

I’m not sure where Keely got the “obsessed with her image” part… I don’t recall writing anything about that… but I haven’t met too many guys who go for the nuts and granola, not apt to shave, no makeup at all, stringy hair type girls…

The women that most guys think are hot… are certainly concerned with their image… which is why they go to the gym, get their hair done, get manicures, etc. You can’t have it both ways…

April 1st, 2005

Katie the Mercenary mentioned

wowowow Christopher right here you are ruining yoru image man. Girls do have it harder, check the studies….girls are told to look like barbie, told not to getfat…girls now get plastic surgery before they are even fully developed so they look acceptable to society. Its not supposed to be about looks but unfortunately it does all come down to looks. Christine you are right I agree fully with you on this one. Its not that we are vain or anything like that its about being accepted…
a real man knows that in a relationship both people have to work at making the other feel loved and wanted. If you dont tell your girl she is pretty she will lose her sex drive, lose her want to go out and trust me there will be big problems to follow…

January 8th, 2006

Christine the Lioness up'n wrote this

I’m glad you get it, Katie. When a guy makes you feel beautiful (ie– tells you you’re sexy, watches you walk away, seems like he has to put effort into not just grabbing you up and kissing you, etc.) you go to more effort to look pretty for that guy because we women like feeling that way and want it to continue. It’s really important to us that our man is very attracted to us and we put lots of time into looking good for him. When you’re around a guy who is critical of how you look or tells you that you need to lose weight or that he doesn’t like how you’ve cut your hair, it doesn’t inspire you to look good for him. All it does is make you feel insecure around him (pull your shirt down so he can’t see your body, avoid changing in front of him, make sure all the lights are off during sex, etc.) And yes… if she can’t feel fun and sexy and flirty around her guy, she’ll eventually find one that makes her feel that way.

January 8th, 2006

Christopher the Pyro commented

I really don’t agree with your thinking on this ladies. If looking good is important to you that is your reponsiblity not mine to make you feel good about something just for your own confidence. If you look good you will know and be confident, if you don’t you will know that also, giving you false confidence doesn’t serve me and really doesn’t help you or the relationship in the long run. It can only work for so long before it all falls apart.. it’s better not to fake things regardless… (I think this way of thinking applies to many things), it is better to be nice if you want to be nice, and not only be nice to a certain point becuase the reprecussions of being too nice can be dangerious.. I don’t know..but I’m not sure why women would prefer to be delusional then just deal with an issue if it exists. If you have a bad haircut, it will grow back, if your overweight lose weight, if you want a tan, get a tan… but most of all.. don’t try and please your man, if you he isnt’ happy with how you look that is his issue, not yours.. if your not happy with how you look because you think he isn’t happy.. that’s your issue and it speaks more to you not being confiendent in yourself then anything he is doing if he is critizing you for shits and giggles that is wrong but if isnt saying anything at all, that is fine. Didn’t your parents ever teach you, if you don’t got anything nice to say.. then don’t say shit.

January 8th, 2006

Christine the Lioness said this

The thing is… if you care about someone, you *want* to be nice… the only repercussion of being nice is that they will feel loved in a relationship with you.

It’s funny how some guys really get this, and yet we’re spelling it out for Christopher and he still resists listening to it and accepting it. I guess whether Christopher’s reasoning is right or wrong, will it really matter if the girl you cared about goes to some other guy because he’s the one who makes her feel beautiful and loved, and you don’t? I guess if you’re willing to chance that just because you don’t think it’s your responsibility to let her know you find her beautiful, then I hope that all works out for you in the end. And I guess if it was worth losing her over something like that, she didn’t mean that much to you in the first place and you owe it to her to let her go find someone who thinks the world of her.

January 8th, 2006

Katie the Mercenary said this

and Christopher if thats hwo you feel then all I can say is good luck because you will never find a girl like this )

January 8th, 2006

Christine the Lioness stated

I guess that says it all, doesn’t it?

January 8th, 2006

Katie the Mercenary thought this

Christopher you are sadly mikstaken

January 8th, 2006

Christopher the Pyro thought this

I deleted my last comment because I’m a total prick, (so now that is out of the way) let me also say I don’t know what we are either. We are fine as long as we don’t talk about it. But about a week ago Christine decided she wanted to talk about it, and it’s been pretty fucking shitty, because it’s all that get’s talked about since it was brought up last week. So i would appreciate people not bring it up again, because #1 - I don’t know. and #2 - I don’t feel like talking about it.

January 8th, 2006

Katie the Mercenary stated

ok we are all just rooting for you guys no more bringing it up

January 8th, 2006

Lei the Mercenary quibbed this

for days i was dying to ask that million dollar question also, but ok then, just keep us entertained and no more questions on that… D then again, goodluck to u both

January 8th, 2006

Christopher the Pyro got all philosophical

lol… ok i was really grumpy last night when I posted that comment because Christine had decided to cancel the lamb dinner she was cooking for me because of a comment of mine on the site. ) See how talking about our relationship gets me in trouble, I’m extremely good at putting my foot in my mouth and Christine is excellent at punishing me for it )

January 9th, 2006

Christine the Lioness said this

He got his lamb dinner… a couple hours later, but he did get it. -) And yes… now you all get to see how “grumpy” and “moody” the boy can be. -)

January 9th, 2006

Katie the Mercenary got all philosophical

must be “that time of the month” no worries Christopher we know how it is lol

January 9th, 2006

Christopher the Pyro chimed in with

Katie, you figured it out.. now quit fucking with me. )

January 9th, 2006

Katie the Mercenary up'n wrote this

now what fun would that be christopher??? lol

January 9th, 2006

Big Dig the Virgin spake, and sayeth

Hey Katie Shut the fuck up you stupid hoe.

January 19th, 2007

Christopher the Pyro asserted

Some serious hate there for Katie.. despite the fact it is a year old..

January 20th, 2007

Christine the Lioness hunt n' pecked this

Big Dig gets very jealous when Katie “fucks with” Christopher… does Big Dig have a crush on Christopher? I hope not… he’s mine! All mine I say! -)

January 20th, 2007

Ron the Virgin scribbled

I know I am reading this way late but wanted to chime in.

I think there are valid points being made here on both sides of the argument. Boths sides are being a bit extreme IMO though.

Here is my take. When you date someone, there was at one time an attraction. That attraction is what got you past looks and into knowing her or him (in most cases). If you find the woman to be nice, charming, funny, loving, caring etc… You continue to date. An accasional comment on your feelings & attraction for her is expected and not that hard to do. If her looks have changed or she has gained weight, expecting the guy to stroke her ego and tell her how hot you think she is, is just plain wrong. If a man is no longer attracted physically, he shouldn’t be expected to lie. The woman should be adult enough to know…”Gee I put on 40 lbs and now my man isn’t lusting me”. That is a no brainer. The woman needs to work this out. I personally would be fine with helping. I would do more chores if she needed time to go to the gym, I would do what it took to give her the time and support to take care of her own issues, insecurities and weight(and expect the same support when it is ME that is overweight or down on my thinning hair. I admit that the pressure is more on women being that men are “visual” and women are more “mental”. However, I also know that when I put on weight myself, the only one that can help is ME. I don’t need her to lie and tell me I look great. I know I don’t at that point. Christopher has a point to an extent. People should be responsible for their own happiness and self image because truely, in the end, you can only really count on yourself. People come and go. However, I do feel that a partner should be open to talking about things and even just being healthy together. Christine on the other hand is putting alot of the work on the guys end. She doesn’t seem to realize that men have insecurities as well. Don’t you think we see our women looking at a hot man as he walks by? We also feel the pressure when all the smokin hot women out there that supply pressure for women to look great, are arm in arm with a strong handsome man with think hair and a 6pack abs. We also feel like “less”. We have to work on ourselves all the time.

There is a bit of a chicken/egg thing going on here. A woman wants to feel lusted. When she does, she will put forth the effort to look even hotter. Men need her to look hot 1st and then we will lust her and say so. Think of when men get horny and lustful in the beggining of a relationship. It is when the girl was out somewhere in hot heels and makeup with her hair all done up and wearing hot outfit. She took the time to “get a man” interested. If a woman takes that away after a while because she is not feeling all that great, the comments and lust from the man will stay in the closet with the hot clothes.

So all in all I think each person is responsible for themselves but having some support to lean on from a parnter can really help out.

March 14th, 2007

Christine the Lioness quibbed this

I actually agree with you, Ron. But do you think it would be okay for your wife to leave you because your hair is thinning. If she’s not at all attracted to guys with thinning hair, then there would clearly come a time (despite what you try to do to keep your hair from thinning) that she would no longer be attracted to you. Lucky for men, most women have– at that point– decided they love their man for reasons other than his hair, and the relationship goes on. What if she constantly pointed out how great other guys’ hair looks? Would that make you feel more insecure or better? There is definitely a ideal in this country that women are supposed to always look hot for men, but men don’t need to look hot to keep a woman. Look at every fat, nasty rapper on t.v. Does he have fat, nasty women around him? No. He is surrounded by attractive women. How about t.v. shows… how many feature a fat oafy guy with a thin, pretty wife? King of Queens, According to Jim, George Lopez Show, Still Standing, etc.

At some point, there should be something more than just lusting after a hot body that keeps a guy in the relationship. Hopefully, that something is that he loves his woman for other reasons. And if he does, then doing things that make her feel worse about herself– like ogling other women, pointing out how hot other women are, etc.– is not an act created out of love for someone. It’s created out of selfishness and manipulation.

March 14th, 2007

Ron the Virgin up'n wrote this

This is where men and women differ greatly! This is something that is simply human nature. Men need visual stimulation. Often! When they are not stimulated by their partner or wife, they look elsewhere for that stimulation. It’s not because men do not love their partner. MANY MANY MANY men will love their wife and stay with her through thick and thin (pun). If my wife was no longer attracted to me, I would understand. I would do my best to be stimulating to her but if she is not, there is nothing I can do. If it was a big enough issue for her, I would let her go and find a man that she is happy with. However, that is rarely the case with women. They are attracted to a man for his looks but they stay in love and with him for the man that he is. Women are more turned on by what a man does for a woman, his attitude, his personality and they way he makes her “feel”. She may lust for other men but not nearly to the point that a man lusts for women. I mean no disrepect or insult when I say, you are a woman and you will never understand the natural, barley controllable, human drive a man has to be stimulated and releived. You can think about it all your life and you will never know the power and all consuming drive a man can feel. This is why many men cheat on their wives but do not leave their wife. They LOVE their wife but NEED that lust. Women on the other hand, that cheat, usually cheat because more time than not, they are missing the attention and passion at home. So there is a huge difference. I accept the difference. There are things about a woman that I will never fully understand but I accept. Such as how a woman can get “emotional” during her cycle. I as a guy would think “why are you crying? Just get over it and let’s go do something!”. I learned a long time ago that a woman has an overwhelming, sometimes uncontrolable need to just cry. I can’t imagine it but I accept that it is so as so many women do just that. Women should understand that men have similarly natural hormones, emotions and needs.

So my point is that men and women need different things. We need to understand that and accept that. We need to help the other however we can. Not with the self esteem but rather with the natural. That means a man need a woman to continue to be physically stimulating to him and a woman needs her man to be emotionally understanding and supportive. (Vise versa to a lesser degree). Those are the things we cannot do for ourselves.

These are men/women issues that have been going on from the beggining of time and will still be there long into the future.

March 15th, 2007

Christine the Lioness said this

I agree completely that men and women have different needs, and your assessment that I can never know exactly what kind of drive a man feels, etc. So you pretty much just made my point… if we need different things, just because a man would like to hear his woman say, “Honey, you are fat. I’m not attracted to you anymore. Fix it,” and a man might even appreciate her honesty in cutting to the chase, women do not respond the same way. To expect a woman to respond the same way a man would, means you don’t understand the gender differences with respect to needs.

March 15th, 2007

Ron the Virgin penned this

I agree and I fully understand the differences. We must, I strive for this everyday, accept the differences and not expect anything that isn’t natural from either side. Thanks and good luck to all!

March 16th, 2007

LIVING PROOF the Virgin commented

Ready for the shocker guys?? This is where it all started.. all women are mental.

here we goooo….She was 5 once.. she had 5 toy dolls presented to her from her mother. Merry xmas go play with them…. So off to the other room she goes ( IM TALKING ALL WOMEN AS KIDS ON THE PLANET HERE) … so shes lookin over the toy.. and wow shes beautiful, look at her hair colour, and her big blue eyes.. “mommy? what is her name again? ” THATS BARBIE! EVERY BODY KNOWS BARBIE? … why mommy? CAUSE EVERYBODY HAS A BARBIE! all your friends, even mommy had some… Barbie is pretty much a princess!.. so the kids thinkin like cool!!!!!! hail barbie every woman on the planet knows her! … mommy who are these other 4 dolls? THEIR BARBIE TOO LITTLE ONE!
Kid - really? hmm..
Kid looks them all over.. and this is where the psychoticness starts… hmm out of these 5 I like this one.. this one the coolest prettyest and shes the ONE!…
But remember this ones hanging out with all the other with exact same figures.. just different heads.. gettin me here?? The kids ABSORBING THIS IN HER HEAD FOR YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!…
so immediately this one starts to dictate orders to all the others.. and naturally one little girl playing with 5 dolls is going to make and learn the #1 doll controls the whole show.. BE THE NUMBER ONE DOLL! BE THE NUMBER ONE DOLL.. NUMBER ONE DOLL GETS KEN AND TELLS ALL THE OTHER DOLLS HA HA YOUR NOT ***AS PRETTY AS I AM***… you guy gettin me here?????????

Are you gettin my point here seriously????????????????? See now ask any female from 5-99.. what she thinks of two guys gettin in a moment about a car or money and throwing the gloves off to fight.. bad bad bad right?? well that was us with our GI JOES and going to war, and rockem sockems.. and whatever. Thats OUR competitiveness.

Well back to barbie.. the girl grows up to be 12 13 14 .. and meets her “KEN” real life ken Theirs always bob and pete.. but no! her friends like KEN so shes goin for ken!!! ( off topic ever seen 50,000 females at a boy band concert? they are so fucked up its not funny) anyhow… So some one else gets real life KEN.. now the other real life 4 four girls including the one im talkin about.. has to lesson herself.. why?? …why didnt things go the right way for,me?? im not barbie enough to get KEN, am I fat .. maybe im fat.. so raulf raulgh… etc etc.. and theres where it all starts.. as for the one who got ken.. shes livin the life.. her friend envy her.. but a new ken comes.. and voilia that one drops old ken and also tries for new ken.. then she doesnt get new ken so she goes back to old ken.. before she loses him for good. WHO GOT NEW KEN?? the one thats been ralphing for the past few weeks ..New kens got a nice car cause he has to top old ken.. so.. date an 18 year or.. or 16 .. at 12 13 14.. and theres mistake number one.. Uh oh another Hott ken is here.. and there ALL ralphin now and worrying about wieght.. cept one! one doesnt do that and shes miserable all day everyday.. and lashing out.. home school etc.. then her parents out of complete stupidness say to her one day in anger about something else.. You dont have a boyfriend and lost your friend maybe cause your lazy… and right there makes a phyco even more cause she already had an idea she lost her friends and all the kens .. cause of her wieght and her mom just hinted at it.. and theres one knocked off. out of the 5… 1 still remains the other 4.. go on living a nut case life regardless of what they looks like.. perfect to any guy but to them.. nope cause they lost to there friends..
SHES NOT THE BARBIE SHE GREW UP PLAYING WITH… so she starts to fall apart.. and guess what.. shes written about on this website and many others like it..

Barbies early childhood hopes, dreams, the way life SHOULD be.. fairy tales.. whats a suitable look for a female.. etc etc.

Only in the next 15 year will women grow out of this bullshit, cause now they have more than just perfect figured dolls.. They have Dora, and etc etc.. I dont know em all. But see what im saying??
15 years from now.. women will be soooooooooooooooo different. They will be easier for male and other females to get along with..

We had guns gijoes cars etc etc … they had barbies and princesses..

In 15 years.. girls will be snowboarding ( more so then now) skate boarding, videogames,

Think about guys.. when a girl says.. I was a total tomboy growing up.. and she just so happens to be hott now.. Is that not the best woman on the planet! Arnt you more attracted to her then say a barbie doll puking moron?

get what im saying??

its just women in our time and their mothers.. are the way women are today.

15 years from now.. mothers wont understand why their daughter could give a rats ass about appearance.. and just want to do stuff instead of makeup and bs.

Hey im not 100% on this but im tellin ya CHris your right.. theres way too many fkd up women out there.

What would you have?? a hott chick that say the same crap over and over day in day out.. My gf of 4 years actually…

or.. a girl that says you comin wakeboarding this summer? hey you got the new ps3 I do too!, is that a 70cc pocket bike? mines green.. right there is a woman who doesn sit on her ass worrying about what people think.. and definately does things so the body will be fair to great anyway.

Like what sounds more fun????????????????????????????????? come on!

Anyhow This was a scattered message I was in a hurry.. cause my girlfriends commiting suicide as we speak.. I heard her go OH god im 111lbs!!!!!!!!

Shes 28.. she looks like jenna jamerson but wayyyyyyyy better face but she thinks shes fat and ugly.. and because of those issues.. unlike Jenna Jamerson I never get any.. shes too affraid to take it all off in the light. And thinks I was born with night vision. Chris KNOWS the truth and so do I.. Christine find a group of females who look weigh ( whether your 90lb or 200 ) and grew up in the same lifstyle and your posting is correct.. but thats not for all women.

All men should sue Barbie for what their gfs and wives have become.

March 23rd, 2007

LIVING PROOF the Virgin added

Hell Im a roll now.. Christine answer this one..

Women hate liers.. but to say “no you dont look fat”..
WHATS THAT?
oh I see thats ok..

Or .. A guy whos never worked out in his life and doesnt eat right.. is flexing his non existance muscles in the mirror.. turns to his gf and says hey do you think Im buff?????? KNOWING HES NOT.. ( like a chick saying… am i skinny?……. or am I fat)

is she supposed to say … YES I LOVE YOUR MUSCLES SEXY!! Your incredibly hott. Let me take you out for dinner!!!!!!!!!!!

FUCK THAT.. she would laugh.. and get on the phone and say.. pffftt know what “Herman” (lol) just asked me?? lol…… HE AINT NO… VIN DIESEL!.. and that would go on for 20 mins.. about hey did you see him in his last movie omg he is SOOOOOOOO hottt.. I knoww.. omg I knoww. hey sarah? know who reminds me of him??… yes!!!!!!!! wow you thought the same thing! wow we need to goto the mall more, is he still workin there? hes single?? wow there must be something wrong with him.

Then shes doin up her hair 1 week later.. and herman walks in.. she says do I look fat.. herman says no baby your hott all the time.. and she says.. OH your supposed to say that your my boyfriend…

and her friend picks her up.. what does she say to herman when she leaves??.. bye hun just going to the mall…..

THATS HOW IT WORKS.. so fuck the sugar coated bs.

even more?????????

Comes home.. in a bad mood.. throws her shit on the floor.. locks herself in the bathroom.. and comes out later and goes to bed..

Next morning.. herman says.. hey baby! you look great today!…. whats she say to him.. Oh SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!….

herman has no idea but the compliments arnt worth shit today…

Later that day .. hey baby something wrong??
her reply NO

Oh come on baby you can talk to me about it…
ITS NOTHING!..

Herman thinks to himself.. OH christine said this is a female way of slowly opening up!.. ok..

Baby I hate seeing you in this mood.. whats wrong..
she starts to cry.. Im fat…

No your not baby! Your hott!
I am not! quit saying that!!!

Yea you are whats wrong??
IF YOU ASK ME THAT AGAIN IM GOING TO LOSE IT ON YOU..

well baby I wanna know…

FUCK OFF WERE DONE ITS OVER..

Hey baby why are we over?? whats goin on..

THERE YA GO…………….. WHITE LIES, SECRETS, AND THE TYPICAL CRAP..

everyone got it.. I know the females did.. For the guys… hermans girlfriend went to mall to see the vin diesel lookin guy cause he was single.. he turned her down..

It all HERMANS fault for lying to her about her not lookin fat. HERMANS FAULT.
Now herman begs for 2 weeks to get a girl back who only dumped him cause another guy didnt want her…. but with enough beggin and put himself out there for his woman.. she takes herman back and says SORRY.. and not for dumpin him.. but herman will never know that.

till next mall visit…………… when Vindiesel guy says.. fuck man I havent been laid in so long.. Wheres a hoe when you need one….

and the next day… “hey were’nt you girls here last week?”

P

March 23rd, 2007

Christine the Lioness stated

I’m not sure I totally followed both of those incredibly long stories, although you do get points for using more ellipses than anyone else I’ve ever known…

But I will point out one thing just to play devil’s advocate. When I open up a Playboy, or turn on a porn, or look at the NFL cheerleaders (all groups of women that men generally find to be the most appealing), there are many more that look like Barbie than look like Dora the Explorer, so I’m not sure I buy into your theory that Barbie is the reason women have unreasonable expectations and some day, all the little girls who were saved from such an unbearable fate because their parents gave them Dora dolls instead of Barbie dolls, will be totally different from the women now.

March 23rd, 2007

Christopher the Pyro commented

(y) (y) (y)

Those were two of the best comments I’ve seen in a long time…. I’m pretty sure I agree 100% with most of what you said… but I was laughing pretty hard.. so I might have missed something. I am however not complaining when Christine looks like Barbie, I think that is great. Hmm.. thanks for the great comments.. your very passionate.

March 23rd, 2007

Living Proof the Virgin asserted

It was supposed to be funny… cause honestly in my opinion you laugh at all of this because people are just plain ridiculous.

So have fun say what you want and if your going through troubles with your “other” maybe their not the one for you.

lol I write long messages when im loaded up on caffine.. (that reminds me).

anyhow till next time.

March 25th, 2007

Christine the Lioness spake, and sayeth

No more coffee for you, LP!!!! -) Trust me… your comment was definitely funny… Christopher and I both enjoyed it immensely… even if Mattel didn’t. -)

March 26th, 2007

ProphetJoe the Irreverent uttered

“Mattel” — that has to be the code name of their other partner in the threesome!

8)

May 8th, 2007

jedidiah! the Virgin said this

So I fucked this girl after talking to her for 15 min and then i never talked to her again, life is great and i don’t get to hear all the bitching, except for when they are screaming on the top of their lungs when we are having sex

August 19th, 2007

ProphetJoe the Irreverent up'n wrote this

Uh-huh, right… I wonder what these “girls” would say if we asked them for their side of the story:

“This creep had been hounding me for months to go out with him and I finally said yes just to get rid of him. Anyway, I got incredibly drunk and decided to give him a sympathy fuck. What a joke. Not only did he have the smallest dick I’ve ever seen, he shot his load in under a minute! What a loser!! Anyway, I dumped him as fast as I could and headed back to my apartment so I could use my vibrator — ah, finally, satisfaction o ) “

August 20th, 2007

ProphetJoe the Irreverent said this

) not o

August 20th, 2007

Christine the Lioness commented

LOL, PJ!

August 20th, 2007

ProphetJoe the Irreverent chimed in with

You know it’s true Christine!

August 20th, 2007

Christine the Lioness quibbed this

The funny part is that you know it’s true too… I didn’t realize guys could get into the heads of women that well…

August 20th, 2007

ProphetJoe the Irreverent commented

I’ve been inside many women… and I particularly love their head. )

August 21st, 2007

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