People who Deserve a Tip

Posted on November 25th, 2005 by Christopher.
Categories: Hilarious.

So I was a Bristal Farms last week, and I was speaking to the butcher and he was giving me some great advice about some steaks I was going to be bbq up later that day… I thought to myself when he was handing me my steaks and saying good bye that he went the extra mile and probably deserved something extra from me. As I walked out of the store it occured to me that there are a variety of people that probably deserve to be tipped that arn’t, and a whole bunch of people who we tip that shouldn’t be. Here’s some examples… An airline pilot, this guy spends 6 hours dodging other 747’s and mountain rangers, at 41,000 feet and the most we give him is nod and a “good job captain” yet I feel obligated to tip the cab driver who almost gives me a heart attack during the 7 mile drive to the airport? Ok, not convinced about the butcher.. think about it, a great butcher will give you prime steaks, and all kinds of great advice on how to cook them, and he will add a great deal of happiness to your eating experience yet we don’t feel obligated to tip him.. yet we do feel obligated to tip the 30 year old degenerate waste of life who fills my order at Starfucks. Seriously the coffee loser does nothing but pour my coffee I would do it myself if your boss would let me, there is no good advice, really no value there, yet I feel obligated to give him a dollar.. (well i don’t feel obligated but some people do). Seriously a Starbucks employee is basically a fast food employee and we don’t tip at Micky D’s. A couple other people who should probably get tips that don’t, mechanics.. (if you ever find a great mechanic, tip them $20.00, they are invaluable), maybe your doctor, and many others, when you stop and think about all the people you depend on that rarely get anything in return (your mail lady / man).. I’ll think you’ll join me in my new national movement of not tipping startbuck employee’s and cab drivers and begin tipper the people who really deserve it.

7 comments.

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Haas the Addict thought this

I agree with you totally, what Mechanics and Pilots do is definately more tip worthy

November 25th, 2005

Mia the Groupie chimed in with

So why do we alwayz tip the none worthy i guess you could say

November 27th, 2005

Christine the Lioness commented

The way that mechanics overcharge for a freaking oil change… fuck them and the idea of tipping them. They’re already getting a thousand times what that service is even worth… at least a waiter doesn’t come up to you when you pick up your take-out order and say, “Gosh… I know you ordered a hamburger and paid the price of a porterhouse for it… and we’re pretty sure there’s a hamburger in the styrofoam container… but it might not be what you ordered at all… as a matter of fact… we did make you some sort of meal, but we aren’t sure exactly if it’s a burger or a taco or what… so just take it home. Try it… if it’s not something edible, then just bring it back in and we’ll charge you the price of the lobster for some other thing tomorrow.”

November 27th, 2005

MsFreud the Virgin hunt n' pecked this

You’re supposed to tip at Starbucks? Holy shit! I’ve been doing it WRONG.
The only odd places I tip are the commissary (the baggers carry my shit to the car, ad they make no regualr wage), and I tip my change girls in Vegas if I hit a jackpot. (You should always do this, lest you be haunted by the lose-your-money gods.)
Taxi drivers may get a tip- should I not want to stand there and wait for them to sort through that supposed “20 dollars driver carries” to get my change. Rat bastards.

November 30th, 2005

Christine the Lioness got all philosophical

I tip cabbies (a) if they don’t smell like body odor (just to encourage the continuation of whatever hygiene they’re practicing, and (b) if they don’t try to rip me off. I love it when I get out of the cab after reading for 20 minutes the words on the back of the driver’s seat that tell me it’s a $22 flat fee to the airport, only to have them get out of the cab, open the trunk so I can get my own bags out by the way… and tell me that it’s $40. I’m like…”I’m sorry? I think it’s a flat rate. 22 dollars.” And then they give me an annoyed look (I guess they thought the big-boobed blonde girl was too dumb to read) and say “Okay… 25 is fine.” If they do that, I turn into big-boobed blonde bitch and go “Hrmmm… no, 25 would mean I’m giving you a 3 dollar tip. And I’m not. Here’s 22 dollars.” And then they’re even more pissed that they couldn’t pull their well-devised little scam on me and march off to their cabs and slam their doors. But other then that… I’m actually a pretty good tipper. -)

November 30th, 2005

Christopher the Pyro hunt n' pecked this

I tip cabbies also… (a) if they arn’t mexican or middle eastern.. (because they they would break Christine’s rule #1), and (b) usually because I am soo soo soo thankful to be alive when I finally arrive at my destination.

December 1st, 2005

Lei the Mercenary stated

lol!

December 14th, 2005

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