Christine the Lioness (3118)
Christopher the Pyro (1985)
ProphetJoe the Irreverent (1216)
Trouble the Pirate (592)
Keith the Director (573)
Mara the Peacemaker (527)
eric the Lil' Devil (351)
AJ the Zen Master (305)
Ben the Kingpin (213)
Haas the Addict (187)
Christine 2 the Mercenary (131) Lei the Mercenary (124) Katie the Mercenary (115)
Ben2 the Soldier (56) Christine the Lioness got all philosophical
I was going to write a post about how delusional Christopher is, but I guess he just saved me the trouble. The only factual statements in this whole thing were that he does regularly call women (including myself) cunts– especially if dinner isn’t ready by the time he gets to my place, and I do get very quiet when I haven’t eaten (as his cousin will attest to). I always thought Christopher was starving me because he’s too cheap to take me out to dinner… I didn’t realize it was premeditated. Hrmmm. I’ll start carrying power bars in my purse.
Lei the Mercenary got all philosophical
hahaha… this is sooo hilarious!
Dan the Virgin hunt n' pecked this
Yes, I do indeed attest to the glorious factor of Christine’s chemical balance that somehow manages to make her shup up for two seconds when she’s hungry… thus allowing Christopher a chance to finally catch up with his own witty rebuttles. Chris is a clever guy when he can “hear himself think”… and a very lucky one to have found a girl with an off button. If only we could all be so fortunate…
Ash Sere the Virgin pontificated
My dad once knocked out my mum with a sledgehammer, accidently. Man was he scared.
Christopher the Pyro pontificated
That is too funny… too funny.. I wonder if i could hit Christine with a sledgehammer and claim it as an accident
Christine the Lioness quibbed this
Oh, no… Dan… really… you won’t be able to disagree that after reading Christopher’s last comment, I am really the lucky one…
Christopher the Pyro up'n wrote this
That’s what most people seem to think… (that your the lucky one Christine)
fuzzit the Groupie pontificated
too, funny
i once threw a soda bottle at an x’s head
i dont remember if it hit him or not
after reading a book called “cunt”
i dont find the word offensive its much better and more powerful than a ‘vagina’
Haddock the Virgin chimed in with
LOL…That was funny. Glad to see the “C” word coming back into common useage 
Erica the Groupie asserted
lmao. hilarious. If he’d have called me a cunt, I wouldn’t have stabbed him but I wouldn’t have been above giving him food posioning in retaliation.
HART the Virgin said this
Oh. I think I can dodge a steak knife, or plan it ahead of time to be out of the room while my spouse is near an open kitchen utensil drawer. But that food poisoning part of your story is quite the scary part .. I’ll have to look at the eggs more closely from now on before I eat them.
» 10 Things Guaranteed to Piss Your Boyfriend Off When You’re Already Fighting by Battle of the Sexes the Virgin chimed in with
[…] Oh. I think I can dodge a steak..(Go)Erica […]
» Hush, Little Girl… by Battle of the Sexes the Virgin mentioned
[…] Oh. I think I can dodge a steak..(Go)Erica […]
» 2005 The Chris vs. Chris Year in Review by Battle of the Sexes the Groupie quibbed this
[…] August 2005 Christopher posts a completely fictitious story about Christine stabbing him on Chris vs. Chris and people actually believe him. […]
kyle the Groupie added
well I have been reading posts for a long time from this blog and i find myself in Chris`s position often…. just the other night my girlfriend… while sitting on top of me decided to choke me…. well we were fighting over control of her belt and both having a good time and then she decided to cut off the air supply to my body… and i`m just wandering Chris… is there a gene that attracts this psycho women… or is it something wrong with my head that makes the crazy ones seem attractive… or the more likely one are women just all nuts? oh yea and what is a good sign that you should break up with your crazy cunt girlfriend?
Christopher the Pyro said this
Well, crazy women are more attractive for sure.. there is no doubt about that.. if they arn’t a little crazy.. they are boring.. I will never argue with that idea. Then again.. it’s a well known fact that all women are crazy on one level or another. lol
Katie the Mercenary penned this
ok so we women may be crazy…but its you silly men who are even crazier for dating and marrying us lol
kyle the Groupie mentioned
well if a guys butt was as attractive as a girls box(or even her butt) then hell i`d leave women and be gay but until then i will push through you psychotic women…..
Christine the Lioness hunt n' pecked this
Oh… and there’s NO DRAMA with gay guys at all… none whatsoever. Great idea, Kyle. 
kyle the Groupie uttered
why thank you christine i`m glad that you are starting to appreciate my thinking out of the BOX (pun intended)
Keith the Director quibbed this
I just don’t see the reason to stab anyone over the usage of a word….So what? he used the word cunt, which is a word you can’t stand or are offended to being called. Yoiu just don’t stab a man for saying it! Shit if that was the case by your logic I would be allowed to stab anyone who calls me a cracker…or a fucking asshole? Correct? Because I’m offended by the words and/or don’t like being called them I’m justified to stab those indviduals? Just want to be clear b/c I’ll be using this as exhibit a in my court cases!
Christopher the Pyro remarked
She’s a woman.. since when has logic applied..
Christine the Lioness penned this
Christopher tried to use this story as exhibit A in getting his restraining order against me, and the judge laughed him out of the court room… Later, the judge took me aside and suggested if he acts up and uses that word again, I should just burn him and make him crash his Ferrari.
8-|
BTW, Keith… it almost sounds like you might actually believe this post. Don’t forget… Christopher is about as credible as Pat Robertson…
Keith the Director thought this
Nice judge how much did you pay him off before the trial hehe…..:-? Oh yes I believe! [-(
Christine the Lioness mentioned
I didn’t need to pay this one a thing… he saw right through Christopher’s melodrama. Vive our justice system! They aren’t all like that crazy bitch in the south!
Dr Harry the Virgin penned this
Women and knives is rather dangerous mixture.
ProphetJoe the Irreverent quibbed this
Women and *anything* can be dangerous — apparently it is the Y Chromosome (or the “SRY gene” more specifically) which adds stability to an otherwise unstable mixture of human chemicals.
For those of you who don’t study genomics, the look at the SRY gene at:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SRY_gene
Christine the Lioness penned this
Yes… and it’s in the name of stability that the Y-chromers are the ones who get into fist fights in bars, gravitate toward violent games even as little boys, and outnumber the women who are in prison for violent offenses 1 to 12. Boy, without that Y to keep the guys “stable,” we’d all be in big trouble…
ProphetJoe the Irreverent remarked
Welcome back, ‘tine. — Canada turned you all negative, eh?
Yes, we males are a competitive bunch and we are the natural protectors in a social sense (protecting the turf, the family, the possessions, etc.), but that was only because men evolved into expendable members of society because women bore the children and were (rightfully) thought to be the more-valuable commodity. If the truth be told, however, women DO tend to be more aggressive in fights and unwilling to “move on” once a confrontation is finished.
After all, you’ve never heard the expression “Hell hath no fury like a MAN scorned” have you? I know it’s only anecdotal proof, but there *is* a reason for the saying!
Again, Welcome Back!!
ProphetJoe the Irreverent said this
Two words, Christine, Puppet Master…
Yes… and it’s in the name of stability that the Y-chromers are the ones who get into fist fights in bars, gravitate toward violent games even as little boys, and outnumber the women who are in prison for violent offenses 1 to 12. Boy, without that Y to keep the guys “stable,” we’d all be in big trouble…
ProphetJoe the Irreverent quibbed this
Btw, I think this post *might* be related to the “Crazy” post…
Christine the Lioness thought this
Sorry, PJ, but you totally lost me.
Since we’re reviving old posts here, maybe I’ll revive a different one…
ProphetJoe the Irreverent penned this
Sorry, Christine, maybe this will clear it up:
Comment 1) Puppet Master = women control men (we’re merely your puppets)
Comment 2) The title of this post is Stabbings, Poisonings and Attempted Drownings and I was merely pontificating that this post might be related to the “Men Speak — Question 4 Trouble & PJ” post about calling you crazy…
just thinking out loud…
Christine the Lioness added
I have never heard the phrase puppet master used like that before… although I do remember Metallica’s Master of Puppets… but I think that was referring to something different.
And yes, that certainly did clear things up. Thank you.
Names and emails are required (emails aren't displayed), url's are optional.
