Raven the Groupie hunt n' pecked this
Wow, I’m glad I’m not him. Eek.
Though props to the lady for being really clever ![]()
Christine the Lioness got all philosophical
I don’t think people are really responding to that joke.
Okay. Here’s another one…
An old man was on his death bed. He’d practically given up on life… his health had failed, he hadn’t accomplished even half of his life goals, and his wife barely spent a moment talking to him. He’d run out of books to read, and seen all the re-runs on television. He was about to surrender himself to death when… a delicious scent came wafting into his room. It was a smell he remembered from childhood when his own grandmother would bake fresh, chewy, chocolate chip cookies. The old man sat up suddenly invigorated. He got out of bed and made his way down the hall to the kitchen where he saw six dozen gooey chocolate chip cookies spread out on baking sheets, fresh out of the oven. His eyes lit up. His mouth watered. It’s amazing, he thought, how the little pleasures in life can mean the most…
He reached down and picked up one of the perfectly browned cookies, feeling its warmth between his fingers. He brought the cookie to his lips, inhaling its scent. Just as he was about to take a bite, he heard a voice come from the laundry room. It was the voice of his wife.
“Don’t touch those cookies, Marvin! They’re for your funeral!”
Christopher the Pyro penned this
First one.. freaking hilarious… second one.. that hits too close to home!
Christine the Lioness added
Are you on your death bed, babe? 
Christopher the Pyro pontificated
No… but I’m pretty sure that is exactly what you would do to me in that situation!